Advice for Older Adults Greeting Young Adults

Our brothers and sisters of the Unitarian Universalist Association have created and published this incredible flyer called Coffee House Caution. 

I know for a fact that these questions get asked of young adults in the church, I've been a victim to almost all of them. I even work in the church and get some of these questions, but most of the unwelcoming curiosity comes when I am visiting churches in the area. 

The comment that I find myself hating the most is, "We need more young people." Of course that would be great, but a statement like that gives you more concern about those missing and no interest in me, the one who did show up for Sunday morning worship or early-morning Matins. I am not trying to be selfish or self-centered, but I want to know that I matter and that I am valued. I do not want to be lumped (with the whole of young adults) nor do I deserve to be the freak show young adult who craves the smells and bells on high feast days. 

I also get huffy and puffy when asked what year I am in school. It is almost as if the only young adults who show up are in some way connected to one of the colleges and universities surrounding the parish. Why, yes, I am a student but if you approach me with a question like that I am going to pretend that I am currently not a student. I may even be tempted to revert to my childhood and stick my fingers in my ears and loudly proclaim, 'La, La, La. I can't hear you.'

I could be overreacting and a little ridiculous, I have been told I do that often by some folks, but if we want to be the church, the church with a radical welcome, it is time that we make that a priority. It is time that we teach people how to be in conversation, how to ask the difficult questions and how to extend a message of welcome.